Tuesday, September 22

Change is in the air...

Well the wind is blowing outside. I mean really blowing!!! It feels nice and cool at 8:30am taking Co'b and Ethan to school, verus the already sweating and we haven't gotten into the car yet type of morning. I heard yesterday that in the next week our temp should really be dropping!!!

On other news, my Nanny called yesterday... for my dad. I was the only one he couldn't tell about his heart issues. He didn't want to scare me. The guy has many faults as we all do, but he really has the biggest heart ever and for there to be an issue with him being a literal 'walking heart attack' hurts me deep. The doctor was surprised actually that he hadn't had one already. Today he goes in for blood work and Thursday in for angioplasty. His girlfriend and sisters will be there. That makes me feel better.

I called him last night. We talked. I told him that I loved him.

When we were going to move out here (10 yrs ago) he could tell that I was scared. As much as he didn't want me to move, he told me to 'GO'. He said that if I didn't I would always wonder and maybe even regret the decision.

I can't imagine my, OUR life any other way than the way it is. There are times when I feel left out. When I feel forgotten about. But life goes on.

I want my family to be apart of 'my' families life... but its hard. I know that I am just a little emotional right now and that its fairly common for this procedure to be done, but its the first time that I have allowed the thoughts of 'what if' to come creeping up since finding out yesterday.

anyways... My Pie and I are going to the library for storytime today to get out of the house.
take care.